A few years later, when I was knee deep in the research, she asked me if there was a book she could read that would help her understand what happened. I recommended Peter Davies' The Truth About Kent State, as I always do when asked. She read it and told me that she could see why I was so upset and it was certainly wrong. But she couldn't quite bring herself to say she was sorry for what she said. To be honest, though, and fair to her, although she's been dead for almost 10 years now, I don't know that she ever really believed she said it. It was one of those things that came out of her mouth -- because, I suspect, she simply couldn't believe what I was telling her, that they killed kids for just protesting -- and I think her own memory of events wouldn't allow her to admit that she'd thought that because, of course, if she meant that, she would have been willing to accept my death, too.

If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just as long as I'm the dictator -- George W. Bush, 18 Dec 2000

She even said that I added to the misery of the people in the Gulf States because instead of using the money to help them, I wasted it on getting to DC. She said people like me were sick because we can't see how great Bush is. That we blame him for everything, even the weather.

She prays every day that Bush will destroy all of G-d's enemies.

I am dead to them. I have "poisoned my kids against G-d and Bush". Because of me, my children will burn in hell forever.

Let me note that most of my cousins are... all on welfare, although they can work. None of them have served nor served a hungry person a bowl of soup. One, my grandmother's favorite, even has a bumpersticker about "Lost your cat? Check under my truck" and one horrible one that has the "N" word on it. But... they are "good G-d-fearing Americans"

My cousin feels that if you are in American, and I quote, "you should speak American".

I have my brother and my mother as blood family. The rest feel that I am a radical, terrorist supporter.

Since protesting, I have learned what real family means. Sometimes it's that blogger you've known for years, and other times it's a knowing glance from a 'stranger' just before a march as you march past the riot police. The look says, "it's okay, we're here for each other".

I am not dead. I am finally alive.  

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. - Jimi Hendrix

If I made one person understand events better, that's enough. And I know, from the responses, that I've done way more than that.

If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just as long as I'm the dictator -- George W. Bush, 18 Dec 2000