March 14, 2000
Web posted at: 11:26 p.m. EST (0426 GMT)

WASHINGTON -- Gas prices have surged in the past 12 months, experiencing their biggest dollar increase in the past 30 years, according to a survey conducted for AAA.

Self-serve regular, unleaded gasoline averaged $1.54 per gallon nationwide, according to AAA's March Fuel Gauge Report released Tuesday.

Damn those Democrats. They're to blame now that gas costs, on average, around $3.72 a gallon*. It sure can't be George W. Bush's fault. If it's one thing we've learned since 2001, it's never Bush's fault (or the fault of any God fearing, flag waving, yellow ribbon bumper sticking Republican for that matter).

Not 9/11. Not Iraq. Not Katrina. Not the Federal deficit. Not the rise in business bankruptcies. Not the corruption by US companies with government contracts. Not inflation. Not the health care crisis. Not unemployment. Not the incredible shrinking dollar. Not our sullied moral reputation around the world and the loss of our influence and power. Nope. You can't blame Bush for that. Not the man who made the ultimate sacrifice and gave up golf for the duration of the War on Terror.

I'll tell you who's to blame for all of America's woes: Barack Obama.** Just wait, you'll see I'm right. As soon as he wins the nomination it will be finally be reported in the liberal media how this America hating, terrorist loving, Israel bashing, Muslim Manchurian candidate with the name only one letter removed from Osama single handedly wrecked the American Dreams of millions of Americans. Well, he and his tree hugging buddy Al Gore, along with the secular humanists, the gays, the feminazis, Jeremiah Wright, Al Sharpton, illegal immigrants, scientists, college professors, liberal effete, elite snobs in New York City, and the defeatocrats in Congress led by that Dragon Lady, Nancy Pelosi.

Just wait and see. The truthiness will out.

* Adjusted for inflation, that's roughly a 185% increase in the cost of a gallon of gas from March, 2000 to today, or an average yearly increase of 23.25% over the last 8 years. Damn those Democrats!

** Should Hillary Clinton's fondest fantasy come true, and she becomes the Democratic party's nominee, just insert her name in this sentence in place of Barack's.